Spicy butthole disease

When you consume spicy foods and you feel like it's not gonna come out good later.

I'm gonna have spicy butthole disease later.

Or

I have spicy butthole disease.

Honk a donk

To honk your donk
Donk = your penis
Honk = jerk off

A different term for masturbating.

Are you honk a donking? Sorry to interrupt.

I'm gonna go honk a donk.