goalie fight

n. From ice hockey. An incongruous event that really should not be happening, shows utter incoordination, poor planning, and a lack of proper attire, and yet is hypnotically entertaining.

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So I hear the mayor of Chicago went up against the gun-control folks. How did that go?

Total goalie fight.

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suck the icicle

v. Fail, do poorly at a task, put in minimal effort. Used by Canadian skaters and curling enthusiasts. Also a sexual euphemism.

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Nice stone fling Natalie! You totally swept the rings!

Thanks. Usually when I come to the rink I just suck the icicle.

Really? Well perhaps there'll be some down time while they pebble the ends. I'll loosen my parka.

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snow's up

exclamation. Snow boarder equivalent to "surf's up!" Usually shouted by overly-enthusiastic newbies at the first sign of flakes.

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Snow's up!

What are you talking about? It's August.

No. There! See!

I think that's dandruff falling off your head.

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broomer

n. Canadian term for the ice-curling "athlete" who uses his broom to mark where the stone-shooter should stand but never sweeps or sweats. Thus a broomer is any lazy individual.

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Hurry hard! Split the rings and ice their broomer!

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whiteout

v. Quit, walk away, usually in fear.

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We doing this?

I don't know man. It don't seem right. You know?

What. You gonna whiteout? I should have known you were not a true boarder.

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charmageddon

n. A full-on irresistable James Francoesque charm storm of Biblical proportions.

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Babe at four o'clock, but don't even bother. She is totally out of your league.

I'm going in. Don't wait up. No one can resist my charmageddon.

So I'll see you in five minutes?

Three.

Skater's dozen

n. Eleven. A reflection of both the abscence of resources and the humour of skaters.

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Dude! This crate only has eleven brewes.

A skater's dozen! Radical. Nine for me and four for you!

Tottally!

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