textillionaire

A person who has officially exceeded one million texts on their cell phones.

John: Mary Lee told me 5 years ago that she has over 10,000 incoming and 5000 outgoing texts every month.
Jim: OMG! That's over 180,000 texts a year!!
John: Now she's telling everyone that she fully expects to be a certified textillionaire by the age of 16.
Jim: Wow! That's impressive considering how few friends she has...

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phoneslinger

A person that can produce their phone with lightning speed and return a text message almost instantaneously.

Jim: I hate texting with Jennifer.
John: Why's that Jim? She seems like a cool girl to me.
Jim: When you send her a text, it takes forever to get a response.
John: Ohh I hate that too! My new girl Sally has to be just about the fastest little phoneslinger I've ever met in my life.
Whenever you text her, you always have an answer right away. Always. I so love that!
Jim: Wow! I'm jealous already.

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Porno elbow

An medical variant of the condition known as 'tennis elbow' primarily affecting the dominant arm of hyperactive males who don't play tennis.

Jim: What's going on Doc? I can barely bend my right elbow.
Doctor: It's obviously a severe case of tennis elbow.
Jim: I don't play tennis, Dude.
Doctor: Do you stay up late, alone with a computer?
Jim: Uhh Maybe

Doctor: Are you right handed Jim?
Jim: Uhh Ya
Doctor: Jim, sorry to tell you but it looks like you've got a severe case of porno elbow. Unplug the computer for two weeks and you'll be fine.

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