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A documentary about a paedophile, eg, âJimmy Savile: A British Horror Storyâ, âJeffrey Epstein: Filthy Richâ,âPrince Andrew: Banishedâ, âRolf Harris: Hiding in Plain Sightâ,
âWhat shall we watch on Netflix tonight? How about a Paedoc?â
1. Number of desirable women in a given situation.
2. Amount of fanny taken on by a man in a given time period.
1. Jeff to Bob: "Okay, so you've told me all about your new job, but you haven't mentioned THE most important thing... what's the office clunge quota?"
2. Ted received a lot of stick for exceeding his clunge quota for the year.
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Attention Deficit due to Face Book
"Been trying to work but can't help checking Facebook every couple of minutes... it's become a problem... I think I've got ADFB"
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When someone shows so much as a flicker of excitement about something, the human fire blanket will smother it with a negative comment about how it probably won't work/ he's never liked such and such, etc.
Son: "Dad, I've been thinking about this for a long time, and I've decided to change career and start a landscape gardening business."
Dad, aka Human fire blanket: "There are already too many people doing that."
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On a cold day, when you walk past the tail of a motor vehicle and a get a rush of warm exhaust fumes over your legs. Or in the winter when you're on a bike and you come up behind a bus or lorry.
It was a horrible ride to work, pissing down with hail, sleet and snow, but when I came up behind a bus at the traffic lights, I got a brief rush of exhaustacy.
Noise (and visual) pollution caused by the neighbours' kids on their trampoline. At its worst when you're trying to enjoy a quiet sunbathe in your garden sanctuary but these screeching little humans repeatedly bounce above the height of the fence, possibly even making eye contact as they do so, and definitely destroying your privacy. Extreme cases of trampollution can occur when your garden is sandwiched between two gardens which each have trampolines. It can then feel as though you're sitting - perhaps also trying to read - at the heaving centre of an adventure playground.
I really fancy kicking back in the garden with a book and big dooby, but I'll have to stay inside because of the currently high levels of trampollution.