The Greatest Thing I've Never Seen

Phrase: Used sarcastically in reply after someone tells you a personal story that was overall stupid, uninteresting and hard to follow;

said in order to imply that the story would only be funny if you were there to witness/experience

Person 1: "... Then the girl was all like "At least I didn't do this and such!" and then I was like "No, you don't get it like that. It's like this you bitch! HAHA!" It was seriously so funny, like you have no idea!"
Person2: "Wow that is The Greatest Thing I've Never Seen."

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Happy Wok

Noun: A chinese man's happy trail

American Teenager: "Dude, check out my epic happy trail!"
Chinese Teenager: "Check out my happy wok!"

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Cappy

Noun: A father who doesn't pay child support and gradually loses contact with his children.

"My dad hasn't talked to me in years and he doesn't even help out my family financially anymore. He's such a cappy."

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GTL

Acronym for "Gym, Tan, Laundry"
-The essential components for a true Guido/Guidette to feel great and no doubt look great.

"GTL. Gym, tan, laundry. That's what it's all about."

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Vahvahduhvava

Noun: The sound Captain Falcon makes on his third consecutive jump in the Nintendo 64 game "Super Smash Bros."

"Captain Falcon Jumps: C^ C^ Vahvahduhvava"

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phantom specs

The act of attempting to adjust or move prescription glasses from your face after wearing them for a period of time and then switching to contacts.

"Man, I just cannot get used to these new contacts. I keep trying to move my "glasses" up on my face and then realizing they're not there."
"Sounds like you have a case of the phantom specs."

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Spanky

Noun: A slap someone endures across the face with a thinly sliced piece of meat; usually done with lunch meat or a patty of a fast food burger.

"Since Mike wouldn't shut up at the McDonald's drive-thru, I opened up his greasy McDouble and gave him a spanky."

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