SORTS

A nightmarish, coded, machine-read Naval message that is supposed to be a real-time methodology for reporting overall operational readiness to a vindictive and hateful computer in Washington D.C. that seizes upon a single minute error and then flames your commanding officer who then shits in your garrison hat.

I'd rather be in charge of the Combined Federal Campaign at the Norfolk Naval Brig and have a bleeding prostate the size of grapefruit than be the SORTS officer.

38👍 53👎

laissez-faire

Fr. Either a term meaning a policy of non-interference in economics or meaning an indolent homosexual.

Pierre, an economic adviser to the finance minister was going to propose a laissez-faire approach to the recession but was such a laissez-faire that he never got around to it.

14👍 92👎

hilario

What Hillary won't give Bill. It drove Bill to seek the comfort of Monica.

If Bill had been getting hilario real regular he could have gotten a third term.

11👍 6👎

soybean breath

An insult implying the recipient is either an anal-retentive enviro-health food nut or a not-bred-for-intelligence herd animal.

Hey, asshole...go do preventive maintenance on your Volvo, you soybean breath sack of shit...and quit staring at me and rolling your eyes...it's taking the enjoyment out my eating this batter-fried triple bacon cheeseburger.

14👍 10👎

license to steal

A law degree coupled with a passing score on the state bar exam.

Congratulations Mr. Ferndock...5th time was a charm, you passed the bar exam...you got a license to steal.

14👍 3👎

what the fuck, over

Military jargon, occasionally written or spoken "WTFO"...while actually saying "What the fuck, over" what is implied is "Are you fucking shitting me?"

What the fuck, over...what PT Nazi came up with the idea of measuring percent body fat every month?

96👍 35👎

smidgit

A little stupid.

Delroy, a smidgit since birth, was dumber than a box of rocks and proud of it.

7👍 4👎