mustard seed sperm

When you have a mustard patch or tardy patch and all the dead sperm spills onto your lover. Usually yellow in color. Mustardy smell due to the latex-sperm combo.

Don't worry baby; it's mustard seed sperm... you'll be fine. Let me get you a german hanky so we can clean you all up.

10👍 6👎

'tard patch

When you have sex with a condom and all the yellow moisture you generate cakes on top of your pubic hair. The smell of the 'tard patch is bitter and funny, just like mustard. It also becomes really mustardy if all the remains of your condom come out onto the hair.

I have to take a shower baby, I can see my 'tard patch glowing in the dark.

11👍 3👎