stripper dog

An old man who is well past the age when any woman
would have sex with him but still acts like a young stud in a
strip club.
A fat guy who is too obese to have sex but pays young naked strippers to rub themselves all over his immense belly.
A loser with no friends who's only interaction with other
humans is the dancers at the neighborhood club.

Sally:" Did you see Grandpa? He's all dressed up!"
Bob: " He's going to the strip club to throw our inheritence
at the dancers, he's become such a stripper dog since Grandma
died."

2👍 2👎

ass taxi

When someone's behind is so large that it would require a seperate conveyance to carry it around.
An electric cart available at Wal Mart or other large retail outlets for obese pigs to carry their wide load butts around the store.

"Junior! Run into the store and go get your mama an ass taxi,
while I find a handicap spot."

17👍 2👎

Selena Gomez

A very cute chick with a very hot body.
A Disney Star.
Justin Bieber's pretend "paid for slut" girlfriend.

Justin Bieber's dad quit paying Selena Gomez to be Justin's
pretend girlfriend so she dumped him.

29👍 66👎

reality retard

Someone too stupid to tell what's real and what's not.
Someone who believes everything is factual that they see on reality TV shows.
Someone who believes what they see on History Channel is fake and E! is real.
A person of low intelligence who lives in a fantasy world.

My reality retard sister can't get enough of the reality shows.

momalicious

When someone's mother is totally hot!
A woman who has given birth to 1 or more children but still has
a perfect body.
A beautiful woman with a delicious body who is also a mother.
A mother who dresses in such a fashion as to cause instant boners with her built for sex figure.

Dude 1: "Have you seen Tammy she's quite doable."
Dude 2: "Have you seen Tammy's mom? She's beyond doable
she's momalicious!

4👍 2👎

jesus retard

A person raised by bible thumping religious fanatics who is incapable of creating a complete sentence without using the words "jesus", "god", "sinner", "salvation," or "amen."

An unbalanced individual who speaks of jesus in such an intimate manner that it becomes uncomfortable to the point you want to vomit then they show you thier jesus tattoo.

A coworker who feels he is ordained by god to leave religious material in the bathrooms, lunchroom, the bulletin boards and your desk.

The cute girl at work that you at one time you briefly considered joining her church in hopes of banging her but decided it would be too wierd to hear her screaming for jesus while you do her. Whose desk looks like an altar and ends every sentence with the phrase "jesus loves you!"

The creepy neighbor who waits for you too come home every day so they can tell you they spent the day praying for your salvation and that your girlfriend is a wanton slut who sleeps in satan's bed.

Office worker 1: "Who put all the religious crap all over the bathroom?"
Office worker 2: "That's Justin's doing, the creepy guy from the mail room with the jesus tattoo."
Office worker 1: "I should kick his ass!"
Office worker 2: "It would not do any good, he would just ask god to forgive you, he's a jesus retard."

16👍 3👎

Kim Kardashian

A some time actress / model who is famous for being famous.
A woman of low moral character who will have sex with black athletes and rappers for the shock value it brings.
A woman with an impossibly large butt.
Attention Whore.
Drama Queen.
A stupid spoiled princess-slut.

Oh my God!! Did you see that attention whore with the huge ass throwing the fit in the restaruant? Who does she think she is, Kim Kardashian? I'm surprised her pimp du jouir didn't slap her down!

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