flat tire

A person who is boring, a downer.

His date was such a flat tire that he snuck out the back door and ditched her at the restaurant.

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Helen Keller routine

To totally ignore someone by pretending you are deaf, dumb, and blind.

My boss called me into the office to chew me out, but I gave him the Helen Keller routine.

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cigar

A slang word for a tampon.

I was embarrassed when my lover asked me to pick up a box of cigars for her at the store.

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arse stain

1. A shit stain on ones backside. A smear of shit on ones bottom possibly caused by poorly wiping ones arsehole or deliberately smearing shit on a persons arse, thus causing an arse stain.

I'm still wiping off the arse stain.

will and grace moment

(n) When a sexually confused (and ultimately gay) man "tries" having sex with a woman who is his closest friend to determine his sexual orientation, similarly to how, in the sitcom "Will and Grace", Will verifies that he is gay by trying to have sex with Grace.

Bob: Hey Sally, so your best friend Steve is definitely gay?

Sally: Yep, he came over last night, we had some wine, one thing led to another, and... well, let's just say we totally had a will and grace moment... He is definitely gay.

barkative

The canine version of talkative; a dog who barks a lot.

His chihuahua was extremely barkative; the dog barked all night long.

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dipped in shit

An exclamation of disbelief or surprise. Sometimes expressed as "I'll be dipped in shit and covered with feathers".

After hearing that his aunt had left home to join a biker gang, he said, "Well, I'll be dipped in shit!"

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