Random
Source Code
Random
To urinate on a fan of the opposite team. Taken from the horrific example a few years ago when a group of Oakland Raider fans beat up a Dolphins fan in the bathroom, then proceeded to urinate on him. Typical neanderthal Raider fan behavior.
The Raiders haven't won a meaningful game in years, which results in the fans having to dolphinize opposing fans to gain any satisfaction in life.
4👍 5👎
Lottery Ticket Asshole holds up the entire line at the convenience store, deciding what scratch-off lottery ticket they will waste their unemployment benefits on. They are convinced that their odds of winning improve, depending on what the scratch-off ticket looks like. Therefore they spend an incredible amount of time debating the issue, pissing off everyone else waiting in line. Sometimes, Lottery Ticket Asshole will even park their fat ass in front of the line, and scratch off the very ticket which they just purchased. God forbid you find yourself waiting behind the occasional Lottery Ticket / Cigarette Asshole combination personality. You will be waiting in line forever. Sometimes, Lottery Ticket Asshole will leave the store and climb into their Mustang, hence creating the possibility of the dreaded and oh-too-common Lottery Ticket Asshole / Cigarette Asshole / Mustang Asshole combination.
I got caught beinhd Lottery Ticket Asshole today while getting gas and a soda on my way to work. I ended up having to use a sick day because I was 6 hours late.
54👍 8👎
Mustang Asshole believes that they own the road, and have the fastest car on the planet. Doesnât matter if their car is a stripped-down version, or has thousands of dollars put into engine performance; Mustang Asshole is simply Mustang Asshole. Mustang Asshole believes any auto racing movie should be nominated for an Oscar. Mustang Asshole often overinflates the amount of horsepower they tell each other they have, because they know that in reality, they will never race their cars and prove it. They LOVE to sit at stoplights and rev the engine, even if they can only race one city block before the next stop sign or stop light. Mustang Asshole usually is wearing sunglasses (no matter day or night) and often sports a backwards baseball hat and a thin, cheesy, shit-stain moustache. Mustang Assholeâs girlfriend is very impressed with Mustang Asshole, however knows no better because itâs the only guy sheâs dated since childhood. Mustang Asshole often uses their Mustang as their Facebook or MySpace profile image, in the slim hopes that some desperate female will dig the car, and overlook their pubic hair transplants on their head. See Cigarette Asshole and Lottery Ticket asshole for other possible asshole personality combinations.
I saw a whole heard of Mustang Assholes rubbing against each other stroking their egos. They must substitute horsepower for penis size.
86👍 29👎
Refinery Asshole is the guy that passes you on the interstate in his âdually pick âem up truckâ doing 90 mph, because heâs on his way to his refinery job. Refinery Asshole drives like a jerk because Refinery Asshole also believes he is a NASCAR driver. Refinery Asshole believes that the refinery is incapable of operating without him. Refinery Asshole reeks of cigarettes, coffee, and refinery stink, and spends his entire day with his filthy, stinking books kicked up on his desk, bitching about how rotten his home life is, and how great he was back in high school football. Refinery Assholeâs âgreat-grandaddyâ, âgranddaddyâ, and âdaddyâ, worked at the same refinery, and guess what ? Refinery Assholeâs son will also work there someday, carrying on the rich tradition. Refinery Asshole hopes that someday, his daughter will marry another Refinery Asshole. Refinery Asshole also believes that greasy, stinking Nomex suits qualify as âSundayâs Bestâ in clothing.
Refinery Asshole passed me up this morning on my way to work. It was unbelievable...I could smell tobacco, coffee, and petroleum as he went by doing 90, cutting me off only a few cars lenghts from his exit.
21👍 10👎
A "deal breaker" is a gigantic, massive shit that you have to take before an important event. Typically, the "deal breaker" feels like an unstoppable force. The name is derived from the following: If part of your work involved meeting with clients, and one of these unstoppable shits happened while you were meeting with said client, causing you to shit your pants...well...that would certainly be a "deal breaker".
I was driving down the interstate praying to God and Baby Jesus for a Rest Area, 'cause I felt a massive deal breaker coming on and there was no stopping it.
27👍 65👎