Captain's pick

An inept decision, taken autocratically, causing distress to everyone except the decision-maker. Popularised by Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott.

"Why is there a junkie sleeping in our bathtub?"
"I said he could. Captain's pick!"

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Cement milkshake

A euphemism for a vegan milkshake invented by police in Portland, Oregon to exaggerate the dangers faced by their friends.

I saw a kid out there with a cement milkshake and he just laughed in my face. My god, what’s happened to this town?

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