schlumpf

a soft, but massive turd; a deuce that is holding back a pocket of gas. when the pile breaks free, it makes the sound "schlumpf" as it falls out of your anal and into the bowl.

I went to the men's room at lunch, but someone had left a huge schlumpf waiting in the bowl.

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schloaf

a nasty, often loaf-like meal

I'm feeling sick after I ate that schloaf for lunch.

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