Cockney Wanker

Someone from London, usually second hand car salesmen, who read the sun newspaper, call all women " dawlin' " (trans: darling) and general ponce about the place like they are something special.

Cor Blimey Guvnah, I'm a cockney wanker, and no mistake!

274👍 101👎

mockney

someone who, bizarely, wishes they were a Cockney when they aren't one. Even more annoying than a cockney wanker since the latter can't help it, but a mockney is so by choice.

That Jamie Oliver is a right mockney wanker

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cor blimey

catchphrase of your average cockney wanker

cor blimey arthur, aren't you garring (trans: going) dahn va car lot?

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jam bands

musical groups with a lyrical disposition towards preserves of all kinds.

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eastender

either a crap soap opera about cockney wanker or the real life place where true cockey waners live

everyone's talking about it- yeah they are saying thank fuck I don't live in the east end like these tossers.

64👍 30👎

Dropping the Soap

why cockney wanker'comedian' Michael Barrymore wishes he'd gone to jail after that bloke drowned in his swimming pool.

awight! I couldn't 'ardly walk after Dropping the Soap in G wing sharrers (trans: showers), guvnah, leave it aht, do what, you're 'aving a laugh!

70👍 83👎

knees up mother brown

national anthem of cockneyland

aind, knees ap muvva brahn, etc

40👍 6👎