attempted martyr

The 'crime' of surviving one's religion motivated suicide.

Upon hearing of Mohammad surviving his suicide attack, my imam declared, "It's just another case of attempted martyr."

perfessional

A not-so-obvious amateur or unqualified person passing them-self off as a professional for personal gain, not necessarily out of malice.

My cab driver was a real perfessional, he/she got lost on the way to the airport. My doctor is so perfessional, he/she performed an abortion the very same day he/she swore the Hippocratic oath!

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