two slices of fuck all

1. a sarcastic reply to someone who is not satisfied with what they have or
2. a claim to have eaten less than someone else
3. a moan that there was no food ready to eat at home

man 1 'I've only got one slice of bread here mate'
man 2 'you'll get two slices of fuck all in a minute mate if you don't stop moaning'

man 3 'I only had a pot noodle for my dinner'
man 4 'so what, I've had two slices of fuck all for mine'

man 5 'what did you get for your dinner when you got home mate?'
man 6 'same as usual, two slices of fuck all'

5👍 2👎

MAKE YOUR TABS LAUGH

Derbyshire Slang:

This describes a substance that is particularly strong tasting or bitter (like lemons or popping candy). the phrase comes from the face pulled when tasting such substance, tabs in this case being a slang word for 'ears'. (also, in Derbyshire this phrase would be pronounced 'meck yer tabs laugh')

Man 1'Whats that you eating?'
Man 2' Raw Lemon'
Man 1' blimey mate if you suck on that much longer, that'll make your tabs laugh'.

13👍 7👎

Guitarsole

a guitar player with an enormous ego, or is very annoying/rude/petulant the word is a portmanteau of the words 'Guitar' and 'Arsehole'
not legally permitted to name anyone in particular but most 'guitar gods' are Guitarsoles at some point in their careers, I imagine.

After the gratuitous 22 minute solo in which several Stratocasters were burned, knocked over and smashed, he raised his arms in mocking triumph to the crowd - of 9. what a wanker, He's such a Guitarsole its unreal, its only the pub down the road, not the Hammy Odeon!