iTurd

Someone who takes forever on the toilet because they are playing on their iPhone, resulting in a scarring iRing around their bootie and irate roommates.

Eric: Randall's been on the can for an hour playing Candy Crush and I gotta go!
Jessica: He's such an iTurd!

Splag

The chunky non-flushable remnants on the inside walls of a toilet after a tumultuous eruption of fecal matter.

Bob is a great guy but has already gone through three marriages due to the splag he always leaves behind in the commode.