FuFu

The greatest soda flavor ever produced by mortal means, with 47 grams of pure cane sugar and a delicious berry flavor. It's produced by the Jones Soda Company and nearly impossible to find, but it's been spotted at Giant Foods and Albertsons. It is the best soda flavor that you will ever taste in your life.

Most historical scholars now agree that Jesus first turned water into FuFu berry soda, which later spoiled into wine after the pagan masses failed to bottle it correctly.

The ancient Greeks used to call the FuFu "nectar," the liquid counterpart to the Gods' ambrosia.

In the late Middle Ages, Dante was so infatuated with FuFu that he wrote a 3-part epic poem in his native Italian tongue dedicated to it. It started with him lost in the dark woods of lacking the Fufu, through Hell, Purgatory and finally Heaven where he meets the holy trinity - FuFu soda, the bottle and the cap. To avoid persecution by the Roman Catholic Church, he was forced to refer to the FuFu only through a religious allegory.

Friend: "Dude, I was just standing there in line with a FuFu when this idiot walks up and asked if I wanted to buy a coke."

Me: "Either he's blind, or he's the biggest douche canoe I've ever met."

96👍 110👎

fufuberry

The greatest soda flavor ever produced by mortal means, with 46 grams of pure cane sugar and a delicious berry flavor. It's produced by the Jones Soda Company and nearly impossible to find, but it's been spotted at Giant Foods and Albertsons. It is the best soda flavor that you will ever taste in your life.

Most historical scholars now agree that Jesus first turned water into fufuberry soda, which later spoiled into wine after the pagan masses failed to bottle it correctly.

The ancient Greeks used to call fufuberry soda "nectar," the liquid counterpart to the Gods' ambrosia.

In the late Middle Ages, Dante was so infatuated with FuFu berry soda that he wrote a 3-part epic poem in his native Italian tongue dedicated to it. It started with him lost in the dark woods of lacking the Fufu, through Hell, Purgatory and finally Heaven where he meets the holy trinity - FuFu soda, the bottle and the cap. To avoid persecution by the Roman Catholic Church, he was forced to refer to the FuFu only through a religious allegory.

Friend: "Dude, I was just standing there in line with a FuFu when this idiot walks up and asked if I wanted to buy a coke."

Me: "Either he's blind, or he's the biggest douche canoe I've ever met."

70👍 6👎