tooth penis

A toothbrush holder in the shape of a penis. It makes a great gift for any number of occasions, to be given to your elders, or to your girlfriends dad, as a sign of respect.

Johnny: Now, that I'm dating your daughter, Suzie, I'd like to make my intentions clear, and I bought you this gift, a sign of my respect, sir.
Suzie's dad: A tooth penis! Get out you little freak!

(Okay, so things didn't really work out for Johnny. Maybe Suzie's dad just didn't like to look of him. But it still might work for you.)

4👍 7👎

TSRFW

TSRFW = This Situation Requires Further Witchcraft
It's a situation, if you're a witch, that is extraordinary in someway, or particularly difficult, and regular witchcraft just won't cut it. Then you say TSRFW.

I have an exam tomorrow and while under normal circumstances regular witchcraft would suffice, it's an advanced placement calculus exam. So TSRFW.

grammer

how grammar is spelled for people with weak pinkies and strong middle fingers.

Is my grammer corret?

15👍 54👎

sarkgasm

having an orgasm from hearing your own dry wit

*checking out sexy women's lingerie*
Patifus: *drowsymusing* huh, they should make this kind of thing for dudes. The matching tops and bottoms.
Narcifus: Really? Patifus. Really? Oh wait, Sarkgasm. Mmm-hmm.

1👍 6👎

Eve 6

Eve 6 is the first surviving product of the lichtfield experiment, an experiement created by the government to engineer, a superior army of highly intelligent and psychic superhuman clones all named consequtively Eves. The experiment failure lay in that though the Eves were of supierior intellect and possessed the desired psychic power, they were prone to anti-social and psychotic behavoir and were hard to control often serving their own secret agendas.

We enlisted Eve 6 to help us fight the terrorists, she cracked their cypher and stole their attack plans, but then she poisoned all our generals our snipers and disappeared into the wind with the terrorist's anthrax.

4👍 5👎

the hurt locker

the oscar winning best picture of 2009/10, a fantastic juxtaposition of cinematic genious/drivel based on a true story by someone who will have no social/political relevance to anyone anywhere globally in about 5 minutes. An artistic picture about the horrors and beauty of *something/whatever*, I didn't actually bother since I have no interest in Iraq/war.

and the hurt locker wins over avatar best picture of the year and that's why I don't care for the oscars enough to watch them. And superbad wins best comedy. Oh Jesus! Do not care, busy; rolling a joint now.

11👍 33👎

Australia

The coolest place in the world, filled with the most coolest people in the world. Santa Clause's summer home is located just outside of Cairns, Queensland. And the whole shark attack thing -- myth!

Me: Wow! This Australia place is SOOOO cool! I never want to leave.

Aussie: Yieh, aur kuale's aer haepy. Aind aur sherks aer frindlee, mite.

Me: WwoooowwwW!
Aussie: Eand way've gat gikoes.
Me: ADOPT ME!

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