food porn

This genre is usually encountered late at night, like regular porn. It occurs generally when you are watching either Food Network or The Travel Channel. You see delicious looking food that you: a) don't have in your residence, b) can't go out and get RIGHT THEN because the market or restaurant you might find it in is closed, c) can't have because of dietary restrictions, or d) can't afford.

Why do I torture myself by sitting here watching Guy Fieri praise that delicious looking omelette only served at Eggceptional Eggstacy in Homestead, Florida? This is real food porn!!

Damn, why does McDonald's have to close at 11PM? I want the Triple-Patty Heart Attack Burger NOW!! Food porn ambush!!

AAAGGGGGHHHHH!!! I could MAKE that if Kroger's was still open so I could get the ingredients! Foiled by late night food porn!

Each of the above is said while drooling with a tongue as hard as the other body parts usually associated with porn watching.

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Distant

Alternative expression for the 60s-70s "far out!" meaning "excellent!"

Friend: I just won in my game!

You:Distant, man!

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