monk punk

A variant strain of science fiction where lovable technophile monks are the heroes of misadventures unfolding in a post-apocalyptic era. These wacky abbots and friars play crucial roles in preserving scientific and philosophical knowledge, even though it gets warped and twisted through the filter of religious superstition, often to ridiculous extremes. Bonus points for radioactive mutants, deformities, plague, witch burnings, alien visitations, nuclear fallout. Like other -punk genres, this one has nothing to do with punk rock, except maybe if you count the mutants.

Contrast with cyberpunk and steampunk, two related sci-fi "punk" sub-genres.

Walter Miller's A Canticle for Leibowitz and Neal Stephenson's Anathem are the twin towers of Monk Punk, a sci-fi genre which might as well include The Name of the Rose, since Europe's Dark Ages were pretty much a post-apocalyptic nightmare of their own.

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robot feet

Ketamine users get "robot feet" when they've squirted so much up their ass that they can no longer tell which way is up. They agonize over every step they take and very slowly perambulate, almost as if their legs were robots under remote control. To sober witnesses this behavior is hilarious. See ketapillar.

I got such bad robot feet it took me forty five minutes to walk all the way upstairs. By that time I was almost sober.

The Great Recession

A major economic contraction which began in 2008. The Great Recession featured the collapse or nationalization of many banks and investment houses. Characterized by a torrent of panicky headlines from the bloodthirsty vultures in America's piss-yellow newsrooms, who tried their damnedest to make us all believe that this was the worst it's been "since the Great Depression."

The Great Recession was the best opportunity yet to rob the public purse in order to bail out the rich-ass hedge fund managers and their golfing buddies.

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Maximalism

Any art movement characterized by a boundless devotion to embellishment, elaboration, complexity, palimpsest, and T-shirts that are sorta hard to read. Overlaps with so-called grunge styles.

My mom made me shop at the Gap all my life. Now that I'm on my own, I've rejected Functional Minimalism. Instead I choose the path of Maximalism, as you can tell from the calligraphic skulls all over this copy of "Beautiful Decay." Wanna see my inkblot doodles?

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Doctor Death March

Slang for Provigil, the brand name for the remarkable prescription drug Modafinil. Modafinil erases fatigue and keeps you alert, but it's not addictive, it's non-toxic, it doesn't trigger psychosis, and most remarkably, it has no recreational value. It even has no hangover. For that reason, it is a perfect companion to coffee and cigarettes when you've got to death march all weekend because you played XBox all week and blew Friday's deadline. Also known as daffodils.

Dude, you better stock up on doctor death march or you might resort to trucker speed to get you through finals.

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rainbow coma

Slang for the k-hole, also known as the k hole. An enraptured state of retardation often mistaken for enlightenment by the habitual abusers of ketamine, a dissociative anesthetic that incapacitates users' higher level thinking skills in exchange for disembodied hallucinations.

Arctor hoovered the donkey dust and nestled into the recliner to spend the day in a rainbow coma. He thought he was god. His mind swallowed the universe like a corn dog, turning it inside out and twisting it beyond comprehension.

Much later Arctor realized we was just on the short bus of schizo-solipsism... again. Why's it so fun to be dumb? he muttered, kneeling again to hoover a fresh rail of kittens.

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frankenfuel

Frankenfuels are biofuels excreted by genetically engineered lifeforms. A major research avenue in the green energy sector.

ORIGIN 1990s: from English slang frankenfood, "food derived from genetically modified organisms (GMOs)." Franken(stein) + fuel.

Our corporate overlords patched the genome of brewer's yeast with designer genes for secreting biodiesel. Now it's only a matter a time until you comes down with a frankenfuel-flavored yeast infection!

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