Adrian

This is one of the most intricate and artistic sexual positions. The Adrian begins with a search down a dark alley for a stray cat. This cat must preferably be out of its mind enough that it will willingly bite the genitalia of a human if it has been covered in a dairy product. Once the cat has been found, its teeth must be sharpened to the strength of new kitchen knives. This can be achieved through sanders, filers, hammers, etc. Next the willing female accomplice's vagina must be covered with a dairy product of your choice and then the cat be set loose on the female. Therefore the result will be that the cat, in the act of eating this dairy product of the vagina, will have pieces of flesh stuck to its teeth. The previous step must then be repeated with a male counterpart. After the cat has sufficient flesh on its teeth, it must be beheaded and served fresh to any person preferably named Anthony.

Oh man, i had such a great adrian last night!!

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Roman

This is one of the most intricate and artistic sexual positions. It involves the male partner defecating on the back of the female accomplice in such a way as to create a makeshift well. This well can also be dug by your own hands. Then the male urinates profusely into this hole so as to create a mixture of fecal matter that is viscous in nature. This allows for the rigorous gyration of the male's penis in this hole and the male must continue doing this until he ejaculates. All this must be accomplished while playing Dawn of War: Dark Crusade on the Icelands map while playing the race of Necrons and being completely cheap with them.

Did you hear about how Jenna got romaned last night by Kevin?

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