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to masturbate.
Can be used as a noun or verb.
Based on the results from the healthystrokes.com survey which reports the average man masturbates 7.2 times per week, or just about one-a-day.
"Sorry I took so long in the shower, I had to do my one-a-day"
"I just one-a-dayed all over the keyboard, anyone know how to clean that up?"
Jack: "Hey dude, why are you so whiny today?"
Jim: "I know, I'm so stressed out"
Jack: "Did you one-a-day yet?"
Jim: "Not yet! BRB ;)"
3๐ 5๐
v. The movement of the large flattened breasts of a particular female in two similar elliptical paths. Caused by the significant thrusting force of another.
I was banging her so hard she was Flesh Pancaking!
4๐ 1๐
Noun or verb
Describes when a woman (or feminine man) takes a load in the mouth and then spits it back onto the guy through the gap in her (his) front teeth. This is usually done as payback for a male dominant sex act (i.e. donkey punch, angry dragon, chili rainbow, etc). Named after popular NFL player turned commentator and gap-toothed black man Micheal Strahan.
note: is mainly performed by gap-toothed hood rats and flaming butt monkeys, but some rich divorcees have been know to do the Michael Strahan from time to time.
Yo my man just gave me the Sneaky Castro last night so I gave him the old Micheal Strahan!
as a verb: I just Michael Strahan'd that cheating bastard of a husband!
8๐ 16๐
v. The act of opening the brown eye of someone very special using a gynecological speculum, sprinkling some nose candy into the dark hole, then packing it in with your hard flesh arrow.
Vanessa: "Ouch! my ass is still hurting and my heart is pounding! What happened last night?"
Manuel: "Actually, a whole gang of us decided to give you a Columbian Colonoscopy... You're Welcome!"
Vanessa: "Oh that makes sense."
Manuel: "By the way, you owe me 20 bucks for the coke."
Vanessa: "Lame!"
4๐ 1๐
The act of smearing feces (your own or a friends) all over your ass cheeks until your white pasty butt now appears completely black. Then proceed to moon an unsuspecting person. The shit-covered ass appears at first glance to be not the typical full moon, but a dark new moon.
*If a person is truly creative, they can use varying amounts of poo to recreate all phases of the moon (New, waxing crescent 1st quarter, waxing gibbous, full, waning gibbous, 3rd quarter, waning crescent, and new)
a cop is sitting outside of Dunkin Donuts and looks up when a car driving by honks.
"hey copper, check this out!" the driver motions to the passenger in the back who put his shit covered ass out the window.
"Oh damn, Tell your black friend that he's gonna pay for that!"
"My friend isn't black, silly! You just got the Philadelphia New Moon!"
"Eww Gross!" the cop shakes his night stick angrily!
7๐ 3๐
n. A pair of pants that are too small for the owner, but had once been the correct size. The owner insists on keeping the pants and making it a goal to become the same size they once were and thus fit into the pants. After many failed attempts, the goal size may be attained. However two problems usually arise: the goal pants are out of style (usually 10 or more years old) OR the owner proudly wears the pants for a day or two and then celebrates by eating something fattening, like the baconator and their fit lifestyle fades away and they begin to relapse into the round, tubby, person they will always be.
my girlfriend says that she is gonna fit into these pants again (holds up some tiny ass pants)
Damn!!!!! they are tiny, when's the last time that beefy girl wore those?
When she was three!
Now thats some goal pants!
5๐ 1๐