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Random
When a delicious treat gets covered with germs.
I sneezed while blowing out the candles on my birthday cake instantly turning it from a confectionary treat to an infectionery treat.
When youâre not one of the truly beautiful people, but enough so to qualify in the off-season.
My wife and were in Portofino, the waiter seated us at a seaside table where others walking by could see us. We thought that doesnât usually happen. Then we realized the restaurant was mostly empty and it was the off-season, so while not truly beautiful people, we do qualify as off-season beautiful.
The slow decay of your manhood after years of matrimony.
I don't know what's wrong doctor. I never get to go out with my friends anymore or watch the game on the weekend. Weâre always doing things with my wifeâs friends. We joined a book group and go clothes shopping together. Hmm, sounds like a severe case of testicular matrophy to me.
Unlike pro-rated, when a someone discounts a service because you stopped using it, bro-rated is when one of your buddies offers you a deal up front.
My fraternity brother rents his ski condo for $1,200 a week. He let me have it for the bro-rated price of $450.
Mansplaining when done by a person of advanced age, typically on a non-PC topic, and at an increased volume.
My father started oldmansplaining to my daughter about the âgirlâ who worked for him. I just rolled my eyes and said, âtoo loud and thatâs not a term people use any moreâ.