Rugby Union

Game in which 2 teams of 15 men spend 80 minutes grinding their faces into the floor oblivious to the fact a ball is even on the pitch. A game first depicted in cave paintings depicting cavemen grappling over the last moose skull. A sport adored by posh people who for some reason appreciate the sight of 30 men slowly moving around the pitch in a muddy heap for 80 minutes. Many rugby union players have faces sponsored by King Edward Potatoes and arses sponsored by Eton College. Any action which could be described as remotely athletic is rarely seen in Rugby Union.

When getting bored watching Rugby Union, entertain yourself by dreaming of a sport where they actually play rugby. See: Rugby League.

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