raging pheonix

you bring that cute girl you've been flirting with for the past couple weeks right. you get to talking. you kiss. this leads to that, and that leads to this and so on. you have sex. everythings normal. nothing to weird. then... the next morning... you set her on fire and leave.

-"i haven't seen carrie in school for days... do you know what happened to her?"

-"well of course silly... you haven't heard about this yet? brett raging pheonixed her last weekend."

4👍 6👎

sneaky panda

first of all i would like to point out that all these definitions are completely wrong. a sneaky panda is a mythical creature rumored to leap from bushes and ejaculate onto unsuspecting passerby's faces.
the common misconception is that a "sneaky panda" is a sexual act between two partners. when the male is pounding the female from behind, pulls out and spits on her back to make her think he just came. but then flips her over and pops in her face. this act however, is actually properly called the"philly fake-out"

"my relationship with my girlfriend hasn't been the same since she was sneaky panda-ed."

13👍 5👎