duck jizz

When a boy duck and a girl duck are in love they have special kind of hug where the boy duck pumps the girl duck full of hot, stanky duck jizz.

Gustav: This sandwich tastes like duck jizz!

Olav: I'm going to have to go have a talk with "Donald" and twist his beak.

It's obvious he's been ducking off onto the sandwich bread again.

Gustav: Thanks, old bean!

bastur mate

A bastur mate is some to share whacking it with.

Eduardo: I feel like having an afternoon wank. Would you like to be my bastur mate?

Ricardo: Sure! I'll bring my porn DVDs.

minge cringe

Minge cringe is the pathological fear of poontang.

Danny's date was going fine until Edie's pants came off and, overcome by minge cringe, he ran screaming from the room.

12👍 16👎

dog fluffer

A dog fluffer is someone who prepares male dogs for breeding by manual stimulation.

Carlo: Why do you smell like dog spooge?

Fredo: I got a job as a dog fluffer. I'm so ashamed.

Carlo: There, there...

3👍 1👎

jizzbucket

A jizzbucket is the modern replacement for the jizz rag.

Plus, after a couple of months, you have a bucket full of unique and tasty cheese.

Fabio became such an expert he could hit the jizzbucket from across the room.

10👍 3👎

mourning wood

Mourning wood is a boner you get at a funeral.

Frank was quite embarrassed when he got mourning wood at his friend Fritz's funeral.

However, he did get some nice winks from the widow.

32👍 14👎

pangolinism

Pangolinism is a sexual obsession with pangolins, a scaly anteater.

A terrible addiction.

Tesco suspected his friend Rupert of pangolinism, but what gave it away was the jars of ants and the acrid smell of pangolin jizz.

2👍 1👎