messturbation

Messturbation means whacking off and not cleaning up.

Frodo: What's that gunk all over the bathroom walls?

Enrico: Carlos engaged in messturbation and took off.

Frodo: What a pig!

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badger farts

Badger farts are farts that rise from a badger burrow.

Due to badgers gorging on carrion, and other unpleasant things, badger farts are green and unbelievably stinky.

Ralph and Cindy Lou had finished the wine, and had settled into some gentle frenching, when they heard a "whoof" from underground and saw a green cloud drifting toward them

"Badger farts!" screamed Ralph.

"Run!" said Cindy Lou, pausing only to pick up her bra.

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horsetitute

A horsetitute is a horse who offers sex in exchange for things like carrots and alfalfa cubes.

As Morton thrust into the meaty loins of Dobbin, he was ecstatic to have found the services of a horsetitute.

The pillow talk afterwards was great too.

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filthy filth

Filthy filth is filth so filthy you want to blind yourself.

When Trevor found Scott's cache of "Pedophile And Shaved Goat Magazine", he screamed "Filthy filth!", and tried to gouge his eyes out.

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basset hounds of the apocalypse

The basset hounds of the apocalypse appear at great disasters.

They bark in their deep bassety voices, mark their territory with pissin' and scratchin', and move on.

Their names are Grumpy, Dopey, Sleepy and Snuffles.

News reports mention the appearance of the four basset hounds of the apocalypse at the Johnstown Flood.

Their deep bassety voices instilled great fear.

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jizzcicle

A jizzcicle is a frozen semen treat with a stick in it.

It's a jizzcicle," said Henry, licking the spunk off his moist bee stung lips. "Want a taste?

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roadkill sandwich

A roadkill sandwich is lettuce, mayo, Wonder Bread and roadkill of your choice.

It's surprisingly delicious.

After running over the rotting possum, Uncle Frank made a luscious roadkill sandwich.

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