monkey job

A monkey job means swinging from a bar and screaming loudly while giving a blowjob.

Very refreshing.

Cindy was much loved around the frat for her ability to give a fantastic monkey job.

8👍 21👎

spawntaneous

Being spawntaneous means being ready to spawn (have sex) at any time.

After they'd had sex on the ferris wheel, Ricky looked at Betty through dewy love-filled eyes, and burbled, "I wuv you! You're so spawntaneous!"

In response, Betty began stroking his manhood for another go-round.

8👍 7👎

monkey rape

Monkey rape is the regrettable practise of a tying a monkey up by his tail and then boning him up the ass.

Can be quite noisy.

Don's neighbors got used to the smell of bananas and monkey poo, and even to the sight of him doing monkey rape on a monkey hanging from his clothesline.

But they never got used to the screaming.

6👍 3👎

duck rape

Duck rape means anal violation of a duck.

Often very noisy.

Donald Duck hid in the corner of his duck pen, fearing what was to come next.

Ned said, "Time for some duck rape!"

He scooped Donald up and lowered him onto his swollen tadger.

The pained quacking was terrible.

12👍 8👎

squintercourse

Squintercourse is two people with bad eyesight doing the wild thing.

Pasquale: So how did your night with Debbi go?

Enrico: We both took off our glasses and it turned into a total squintercourse.

I believe at one point I was boffing her bellybutton.

Pasquale: Yikes!

messturbation

Messturbation means whacking off and not cleaning up.

Frodo: What's that gunk all over the bathroom walls?

Enrico: Carlos engaged in messturbation and took off.

Frodo: What a pig!

3👍 1👎

cheese ball

A cheese ball is a replacement testicle made from cheese.

After the alligator hunting accident took his nut, Dwayne had a cheese ball made.

Unfortunately, the cheesy smell made him very popular with local dogs.

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