Social Welfare Mobile

Slang for a Fiat Punto. Generally driven by knackers, scobes and boy racers, though most of the aforementioned are usually one and the same. As a result, they are cheap, unreliable and rust after a few years.

See also Honda Civic.

Fucking Social Welfare Mobile cut me off at the Magic roundabout.

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Three-headed monkey

Mythical creature, the possible presence of which makes a great distraction.

I'm going to read all 3174 passages of my new book to you.

I'm sure that'll be interest.....Look! A three-headed monkey!

47👍 4👎

Scumbag College

1) The College from the tv series The Young Ones. Vyvian, Mike, Rick and Neil all study there, but never seem to go in.

2) Nickname for CIT, due to the number of block release apprentices that hang around the place

And representing Scumbag college, Mike, Prick, Vyvian and Neil.

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Hard man

Those last two definitions of Hard Man are all wrong. The first one is actually referring to a chav, which is quite the opposite, and the other was written by someone who plays too much Mega Man.

A Hard Man is someone who is unafraid of a fight and/or can take loads of physical punishment and drink.

He just smashed a bottle over the bouncer's head. What a Hard man

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camelot

King Arthur's castle. A rather silly place.

We're knights of the round table,
We dance whene'er we're able.
We do routines and chorus scenes,
With footwork impeccable.
We dine well here in Camelot,
We eat ham and jam and spam-a-lot

We're knights of the round table.
Our shows are formidable.
So many times,
We give them rhymes,
That are quite unsingable.
We're opera mad in Camelot,
We sing from the diaphragm-a-lot.

In war, we're tough and able,
Quite indefatigable.
Between our quests,
We sequin vests,
And impersonate Clark Gable.
It's a busy life in Camelot.

I have to push the pram-a-lot.

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Tayto

Best brand of crisps ever. Synonymous with crisps in Ireland. The inventors of Cheese and Onion in 1954, has been ripped off by every English crisp company, but never equalled. Excellent for a hangover when combined with a bottle of Lucozade.

Give us a bag of Taytos, bud.

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LSJ

Long as a Snake Jake

u know

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