food dog

(noun) A dog who's primary motivation in life is eating people food from the table. Food dogs are typically fixed and have owners with bad habits of feeding them. Almost 100% of beagles are food dogs.

"Fido is kind of just a food dog now that he's fixed. He doesn't need to impress the ladies so hes always under my feet at the table"

Charlie

Someone who is most likely exhausted. Exhausted from all the different pop culture references they have to keep track of with their name. Most Charlies are 100 years old, but for the few who still are sentient enough to use the internet, they have been through a lot in the last 10 years.

Every Charlie under 20 has at some point had their boss say “Charles in charge!” Or “Sorry Charlie!”, only to follow it up with “you’re probably too young to get the reference!” But all Charlies do. Because every employer/authority figure in their entire life has gone through the same pattern, recognizing quotes from old commercials, and then recognizing how old they are.

All Charlies remember the period from 2007-2009 when people would continuously tell them that “we’re on a bridge” or “it’s a leoplurodon”, only for that to be replaced with the 2009-2011 fad of asking to bite their finger in the worst Tiny Tim impression possible. Every time Charlie’s name is mentioned, both of these videos are patronizingly introduced to Charlie as if Charlie has never seen or heard of it.

These events have made all Charlies have a strong bond due to their universal experience, and it is very common for Charlies to have the exact same stories about how people interact with their name. As bearers of the original meme-name, this makes Charlies more empathetic towards other people who have had their name borrowed, such as Daniel, and to a lesser extend people actually named Karen.

I sent Charlie this cute video from 10 years ago about this baby biting his brother’s finger and I’ve never seen such a look of weathered exasperation in his eyes!