daisy chain

a group of three or more male homosexuals cojoined penis/anus to form an endless chain. the idea is to all ejaculate at exactly the same time

"hey mandy" cried out reinhard "come and join this daisy chain, we're just about to pop."

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dick chainy

a chain used by gay men to ensure their partner's faithfulness - a bit like a chastity chain. the ultimate defence against unwanted sex.

colin felt disgruntled. every time he went cottaging today he met a guy with a dick chainy

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oyster kebab

a kebab comprising sheeps eyes and sheeps testicles. these are placed alternately on the skewer and cooked for about 5 minutes. it is important to start and finish with an eye.

punter: "have you got plenty of oyster kebabs?"
ali: "over two hundred, my friend"
punter, running away: "well you shouldn't have cooked so many, MY FRIEND."

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prat hat

press on towel of the sanitary variety usually worn by young girls who don't really know what a good flood is.

Ah, poor little jodi was wearing her first prat hat and feeling so proud when the boys following shouted "oi you just dropped sumfink" "too late the flies are on it"
boys can be right bastards

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meat & two veg

penis cock & testicles bollocks

alec entered the gay restaurant rather apprehensively and took a seat. the waiter minced over and said "would sir care to see the menu?"
"no" replied alec "i really want your meat & two veg!"

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butterfly kiss

using both hands to stretch the scrotum outwards and upwards so forming a butterfly wings shape - then licking the taut skin with ones tongue tip

colin is so lucky, not only does his wife give him a butterfly kiss whilst he's watching tv, but he can reach down and give himself one!!!

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hammers

1. supporters of West Ham United Football Club
2. plural of hammer
3. there is no three

1. "up the hammers""alan partridge's claret & blue army"
2. "have you got fork handles?""yes""OK i'll take the candles and four hammers"
3.--------

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