pretentious hipster

oh man... OH MAN! OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN! whoever wrote that definition before me. THAT is pretentious hipster talk. Hipsters are never okay and they don't actually have opinions, obnoxious or otherwise. They merely conform to unpopular fashions. That's it. That's all. It's a self-entitled way to feign social awkwardness that people with their total lack of worthwhile qualities and talent would be feeling as genuine outcasts if they didn't secretly believe themselves superior and ironically hilarious. In this way, it's also an attempt to cash in on attention using geek chic. They don't care about winning arguments because they don't have beliefs except the above. Pretentious people try to sound smarter than they are, e.g. by making dissonantly unnecessary references to counter culture figures, but hipsters are so far beyond pretentious that they think appreciation of meaningless t-shirt slogans is enough to elevate them to social icon status. This makes the phrase pretentious hipster so redundant that it should just be shortened to hipster, except when describing what hipsters talk about; ie pretentious hipster bullshit, such as "I met that indie rock singer. She's an argyle superstar." A hipster is a therefore a psychological trainwreck that should be avoided until he/she inevitably ruins itself.

1: Are you going to use Scorsese references in your pretentious hipster bullshit this weekend?

2: No, film is too mainstream. I'm just sucking fame's dick in a general way until someone tells me a new way to seem unique.

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