Coachaholic

Coachaholic: (n) coach-a-hol-lick

1. A person who is enfatuated with the Coach brand and buyes every Coach item available
2. Someone who is obsessed with Coach "The Dragon Slayer" from the Survivor tv series. This person often aspires to achieve the "warrior" status and will talk endlessly about Coach. Coachaholics also tend to not realize how full of himself Coach really is. These people aslo seem to think that they are superior to "non-warriors"

Coachaholic Girl: "Hey gurl! I totally went to the Coach store yesterday!"
Normal Girl: "Cool! Did you get a new purse?"
Coachaholic: "Yeah! And the sneakers, the scarf, the keychain, wallet, shirt..."
Normal Girl: *backs away*

Guy: "Dude, why does your shirt say 'Dragon Slayer' on it?"

Coachaholic: "It allows me to form an unbreakable bond with the 'Dragon Slayer' which alows my mental, spiritual, and physical being to be cleansed so that I too can become a warrior."
Guy: "Wtf are you talking about, that shirt's from Sears."
Coachaholic: "I wouldn't expect a non-warrior to understand."

Blonde Roots

Blonde Roots: (n)

1. A blonde person has dyed their hair and their roots have grown out
2. A phrase used to tell someone who doesn't have blonde hair that they are stupid or ditzy because of the stereotypical idea that blonde people are stupid or ditzy

Blonde: Wow, I really need to go to the salon, my roots are showing

Tanya: "OMG, did you know that Niagra Falls is in Canada?"
Rebecca: "Um duh, everyone knows that"
Tanya: "I just foud out! Isn't that awsome?"
Rebecca: "Careful Tanya, your blonde roots are showing"
Tanya: "Wha? Im not blonde!"

Jersey Devil

Jersey Devil: (n)

1. A monster with hooves and horns who occupys new jersey. The jersey devil tends to suck the resources out of everyone/thing around it, leaving its victims dry husks of hopelessness. It particularly enjoys harassing children and those who teach
2. Chris Christie

"Did you hear that Christie's slahsing the school budget and a bunch of teachers are going to get fired instead of the useless supervisors?"
"Yeah, that guy's the Jersey Devil."

29👍 8👎

Squirrel

Squirrel: (n)

1. Adorable fuzzy rodent things with gigantic bushy tails and an hardcore acorn fettish
2. Unfortunate creatures who my cat enjoys eating
3. Irritating little buggers who at the last second run in front of your car and stop so you have to slam on the breaks
4. The most common type of roadkill

Cara: "Hey Mark, what's your cat doing over there?"
Mark: "Oh, he's just eating a squirrel"
Cara: *barf*

Child: "Mommy, what's that sqished furry thing on the side of the road?"
Mommy: "Oh, um...that's a squirrel napping sweeite"
Child: "Oh, I thought it was roadkill"

1👍 5👎

Nerd

Nerd: (n)

1. An insult used to imply that someone is weak, unsociable, or weird

2. A person who spends chunks of their lives playing WOW or Halo

3. Someone who is very intelligent and is envied by his/her peers because of his/her superior grades

4. A delicious and crunchy candy that comes in a cute little box

Wimp: *struggling to lift 40 lbs.*
Jock: "Wow what a nerd"

Nerd: "ZOMG, i ttly pwnd ths kid on WOW last nite"
Normal Person: "Why are you talking like that? Nerd."

Smart Person: "Yay! I just got a 99 on my calculus test!"
Jealous Weenie: "Because you're a nerd!" *fist bumbs other jealous weenie*

Lucky Kid: "I have nerds, does anyone want some?"
Everybody: "ME!!!"

11👍 8👎