you don't know where my life has been

A phrase yelled at the top of one person's lungs to let everybody know that they have been through tough times.

Duder 1: "So tell me this doggy. Why the hell don't you take your pain meds instead of selling them shits on the street? Isn't your neck fucked up from the car accident?"

Duder 2: "Dude I need the money! I've been through so much shit lately. You don't know where my life has been!"

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sing-n-smack

A move where one person is singing, but gets interrupted by another person hitting them over the head with something.

Duder: "Thanks for inviting me over for dinner. I've never known an Italian guy before. Can you sing me a song?"

Italian: "When-a the moon-a hits-a your eye, like a big-a" (smack!) "owww!!!"

Italian's Mom: "You shut up-a you!"

Italian: "Damn mom you hit over the head with a book! What the hell was that for?"

Duder: "Whoa dude! I've never seen a funnier sing-n-smack in my entire life."

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th=f

A formula that helps white people translate African-American slang.

Black Duder: "Yo dogg I speak da truf! I saw that trick at da club last night."

White Duder 1: "What is he talking about friend? Is he referring to my girlfriend?"

White Duder 2: "Yea dude, when you talk to gangsters like that remember that th=f. He said he is not lying to you and that he saw your girl at the local night club last night."

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cacky

Used to describe a guy who is cocky about his penis size.

Duder 1: "Dude my cack looks so big sometimes."

Duder 2: "I'm so happy for you... what the fuck am I supposed to say to that dude? You're so cacky sometimes."

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wine tasting noob

A person who doesn't know anything about wine tasting culture. This type of person may get drunk at the first winery, not knowing there will be more tastings at multiple other wineries to follow.

Duder 1: "Can't believe you paid for 8 samples. You're gonna get tossed."

Duder 2: "What's wrong with that?"

Duder 1: "You know we're going to like 4 other wineries right?"

Duder 2: "OMG! Really? I thought we'd just kick it here."

Duder 1: "Such a wine tasting noob dude."

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wasted call in

When your boss asks you to work on Saturday or Sunday and you come in only to find there isn't any real extra work to do.

Duder 1: "Dude it was hella gay how I came in to work Saturday for like 2.5 hrs. What a fucking waste of my time and gas."

Duder 2: "Yea dude your boss totally used a wasted call in on your ass."

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sicilian slide

When a guy slides down between the bed and the wall to hide from his girlfriend's incoming parent(s). This is most common with Sicilians because they are usually fucking girls they shouldn't be.

Foreigner: "Hey I tell you what, I almost got caught the other night. I had to slide down between the bed and the wall just before her parents came in."

Duder: "Whoa man, you did a sicilian slide? Damn, that's always a close call!"

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