australian alarm clock

this is when you awaken your significant other by shoving your thumb in her ass, while yelling common Australian catch phrases. "G'day Mate!" and "I just shoved my shrimp in your Bar-B!" are the most common.

Mary prefers the Australian alarm clock to the Eskimo mushroom hammer.

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Nature's Alarm Clock

Noun. The act of awakening in absolute astonishment to yourself doing any of the following:

- wetting the bed, pretty much standard and definitely the most common of nature's alarm clocks.

- ejaculating, also known as nocturnal emmissions; most commonly found with young pubescent men who have not yet mastered the fine art of masturbation, or just weird fucks who don't masturbate for some god foresaken reason.

- shitting, definitely the rarest and most frightening of all of nature's alarm clocks. Don't ask me how this happens but rumor says that it is most commonly experienced in things called fraternity houses.

Young Man: "I just woke up and my weiner was glued to my leg, and I had this bizarre feeling of euphoria and relaxation."

Knowledgable Elder: "Oh, don't worry youngster, nothin' to fret about thats just Nature's Alarm Clock telling you its time to get up and apparently do some laundry."

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barbie alarm clock

For a man to be woken up by his girlfriend/one night stand/wife sucking him off.

"Man she woke me up with a barbie alarm clock"

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metal alarm clock

the act of taking a guitar and amp,setting it next to the unlucky individuals head (whilst asleep) and rocking hardcore to wake them up

yea ryan hit me with the metal alarm clock this morning at 6.

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Arabian Alarm Clock

A very grotesque way of waking someone up. To perform the arabian alarm clock you must kneel over another persons face and let thier testicles sink into their eye sockets. Then you get you penis erect and begin to beat them over the head with it. Also known as the "T-Bag Wake Up Call"

Tim gave me the Arabian Alarm Clock this morning. So I fed him super-choco-lax brownies for afternoon tea.

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Tijuana Alarm Clock

When you wake up in the morning with an erection and take a dump that is so satisfying, you cum.

I had a Tijuana Alarm Clock this morning and knew it was going to be a fucking awesome day.

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Oklahoma Alarm Clock

A cruel joke in which you wake up your friend (or any individual) by hitting him repeatedly in the face with your dong.

Dude 1- "what an awful start to the morning"
Dude 2- "what happened to you?"
Dude 1- "Derek decided it would be funny to wake me up with his Oklahoma Alarm Clock"

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