My cat ate it

Sounds like an excuse from the 80's for why a kid didn't have their homework done on time, but if you're talking about why a houseplant is no longer with you, sometimes it's true.

Girl- Why is your houseplant dead? Were you too high to notice it needed water?

Guy- My cat ate it smartass.

Razzlemataz My Tabby Cat

Pronounced "Raz-zel-ma-taz My Tab-by Cat". Slang for "Fuck My Pussy"

Hey there, wanna Razzlemataz my tabby cat?

shave my cat

Shaving the vagina

Hey Rob you wanna help me shave my cat later?

My Cat

That moment when you excessively drink bubble tea for countless days on end

friend: Hey is that Bubble tea
Me: yes I am doing My Cat

my cat

me: ok im at home

my cat: rooooooooooooom im a car i` just got out of the car

me: oh no my cat is gonna run over me

me" gets run over while running down the hall

me: oooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

my cat is gonna run me over

My Cat

My cat is a cute but vicious one.

My cat is annoying as Fuck.

pet my cat

Clicking the mouse. Entertaining the vaginal area with (enter object here). Stroking your lady parts. Purring like a sweet little kitten while flicking your bean.

I pet my cat so hard that I purred, screamed and wailed because my mouse was quivering while holding my bean.