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Twilight

Possibly the worst book ever written, the writter says she did no research into the vampire mythos and wrote the book with no prior knowledge of vampires. This is a load of bullshit as every adult on the planet knows basic vampire mythos, the writer is just a lazy tard. In the book we have a heroine with no personality, who teaches girls that they can't live without boyfriends. Her boyfriend, Edward, is a vampire who sparkles in the sunlight, rather than dying, and is a "Vegitarian" i.e. a Vampire who doesn't drink human blood. Yet he's dating a human, a constant source of temptation. This is like a recovering crackhead, dating crack. The storyline is full of plotholes so big a semi would fall through them. Fans of Twilight are semi-sentient little retarded tweens and the pedophiles who stalk them.
A final note, the most major plothole in twilight is this. If vampires have no weakness, WHY THE FUCK DON'T THEY RULE THE WORLD IN TWILIGHT?! Cuz seriously, if Dracula didn't have to worry about sunlight, the book would have ended with his victory, not his death.

Twilight sucks. Edward is a fag.

Bella: OMG Edward you sparkle!
Edward: Thats because I'm really a fairy Bella! thats why I sucked off your dad! Now kiss me so you can taste his man butter on my tongue!

by TheGuyWhoRapedYourMom June 1, 2012

11๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

The worst book ever. No plot, no character development, pedophilia, necrophilia.....the list goes on forever. There are millions of rabid fangirls out there just waiting to rip your head off if you say one bad thing about Twilight. Even mention the word "twilight" and they'll be next to you in second. Also, Twilight has somehow made them forget everything they have learned in English class since many of them can no longer spell or use grammar. A typical fangirl also believes that Edward is real and that she will one day marry him. Also, one of the most annoying things is that the"vampires" sparkle. SPARKLE. Seriously? Stephanie "Mormon" Meyer has turned the fearsome vampire into a cuddly vegetarian. Give me a break.

Typical Twilight Fangirls - "omgggg edward is so HAWWWT! how do u, lyk, thnk hes ugly?" "i knoooo any1 who thnks hes ugly must b blind or somethng"

"edward is amazinggggg hes gonna marry me 1 day nd im gonna hve demon babies with him!!!!"

by Casey R. Hunter April 1, 2010

45๐Ÿ‘ 10๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

The best source for bathroom tissue.

Oh man, I ripped out some Twilight pages out last night and the feeling of even more shit in my ass made me feel ecstatic!

by Miraclez December 3, 2009

41๐Ÿ‘ 9๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

A book where a girl named Mary Sue and a boy, Gary Stu, go on a magical adventure to find personalities! :D

Mary Sue:OMG ILUUUU
Gary Stu: ILU2!!1!1!
-Twilight in a nutshell

by 8D Anne Rice FTW September 27, 2008

136๐Ÿ‘ 39๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

twilight is a story about a 106 year old horny pedo who turned himself into a sparkly teenage pretty boy to lure 17 year old girls to his fuckin mansion.

LIEK AMGZ!!! EDWERD IZ LIEK SOO TO-DALLY HAWT!!!

Twilight is gay.

by TheStupidAznGrl July 19, 2010

15๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

A book written by Stephane Meyer that features a girl named Bella Swann and a 108 year old vampire named Edward. Being the new girl in high school, she completely falls in love with him, and being a vampire, he has to resist drinking her blood because she smells so damn good. At first he warns Bella about his dangerousness, but then succumbs to his love for her and he and his vampire family protects her from these tracker vampires who want to kill her.

Well, isn't that the most retarded piece of shit I've read. I honestly can't believe people consider this good literature. The author describes Edward more times than you can talk words in a minute and the saddest thing about it that it is a best seller. Twilight is not deep, its not philosophical and it sure as hell not fucking romanace with its 2-dimensional, half assed crap. This being compared to Harry Potter is incredible, since JK Rowling actually put CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT and PLOT in the fucking story. The author contridicts her own canon to fit Bella. It saddens me how Americans think this is so good.

Too many people take it seriously because its so dark and amazing. The characters are shit with the exception of Jasper and Alice, the only two interesting characters in there who are completely overshadowed by Edward and Bella's romance.

Oh and by the way, vampires sparkle. IN sunlight. They don't burn. Oh great.

Bella from Twilight able to control herself when she was a newborn but Jasper couldn't? He won't stand for this mind-fuckery.

by Fairy-Peacock April 21, 2009

182๐Ÿ‘ 55๐Ÿ‘Ž


Twilight

A girl who falls in love with an emo kid.

I can't believe she's dating the guy who cuts himself. She's so twilight.

by BSer95 March 24, 2009

32๐Ÿ‘ 7๐Ÿ‘Ž