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carpet artist

The complimentary title you give your husband so that he will continue to perform his vacuuming duties.

I am endlessly astounded by your undying commitment to the craft, you are a true carpet artist!

by Dr Bunnygirl September 17, 2019

14๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


carpet shark

A pet ferret.

Ferrets slink around down on your carpet and bite your feet as you walk, much like little sharks in your carpet. This is especially true if you have a very small ferret and very tall shag carpet.

My carpet shark is an albino. He also keeps hiding my keys in the mattress.

by MUCHAS SMOOCHES August 22, 2004

151๐Ÿ‘ 34๐Ÿ‘Ž


Flying Carpet

When you are in a public place and have to take a shit really bad, but the toilet has piss all over it. So you have to bend over the toilet with out touching it, as if you were hovering over it on a flying carpet.

I was at the stadium watching the Chargers and had to take a shit, so I had to perform the flying carpet.

by Travis Mo Dogg October 16, 2008

29๐Ÿ‘ 4๐Ÿ‘Ž


carpet walkers

"White collar" or middle manager workers, usually located in cube farms or front offices of manufacturing plants, so called because their work space is carpetted instead of bare concrete.

"The system always slows down when the carpet walkers come in around 8am."

by StBill February 29, 2012

20๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


carpet creeper

when you fart, and its a silent one, and it creeps under peoples noses, and it lingers in the air for a while

''ahhh, what is that smell, its making me sick''

'' it was a carpet creeper''

by ronaldo17 March 16, 2009


Hairy Carpet

someone (normaly a woman) who has a lot of pubic hair.

"man, that bitch's hairy carpet was crazy!"

by Smexalicious October 22, 2009


carpet cop

A.)A lazy cop who stays inside the station.

B.)A cop who does nothing but clerical work inside the station.

''Man, the sergeant is such a lazy ass! He's such a carpet cop. All he does is stay inside while we're out on the field.''

by soybean1 October 11, 2009