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The Walrus Theory

The Walrus Theory is the general theory which states that when a guy is around other guys for so long that when he sees an ugly girl she appears very attractive. The theory is derived from sailors hundreds of years ago who would sail for years on end without seeing a single female and would then begin to think that the walruses in the ocean were beautiful mermaids.

Jimmy: "I just got back from that two month long all guys summer camp and saw that Helga must have lost weight, shes lookin' fine!"

Tyler: "Dude, Helga hasn't changed, you're just suffering from The Walrus Theory."

by Henry Litchford February 17, 2012


Tat's Theory

"Everything sucks because it can suck."

Alternatively, "Everything sucks."

According to Tat's Theory, everything sucks because it can suck.

by Tatsux March 28, 2011


Monsters Theory

Monsters Theory is the now-mainstream belief that very large breasts on young, lean women is the single most attractive look a woman can have, despite it having a relatively limited genetic basis (as studies of female siblings have shown) There is no established explanation for how women with 25-30% body fat and large breasts have their figures but luck seems to play the biggest role, since their looks and their breasts both are not an accurate reflection of their parents. The theory that attractive parents produce attractive children has become eroded due to monsters theory. Monsters theory states that genetics play some role, but far less than expected and otherwise ugly, fat parents with not particularly good genes can unleash bombshells on the world.

Example: Guy 1: Did you see that girl at the gym? Man, those were huge!
Guy 2: Monsters Theory in action. Let the monsters do the talkin.’
Guy 3: You scared bro?

by Eric Kazinsky September 20, 2015

19πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


Lockhart's Theory

The theory that you can determine one's well being by asking a completely irrelevant question.

Have you heard of Lockhart's Theory?

by InquisitiveNinja April 18, 2019


league theory

The theory that everyone is part of a league of individuals whoose dating is restricted to the league. Leagues can be determined based on a number of factors, including physical appearance, profession, income, style of dress, preferred music genre, knowledge of game, etc.

According to league theory you are sure to be rejected by someone above your league, and u would be a loser to date someone below your league.

League theory. Dat sum old bullshit fer real dawg. You can date and fuck anyone you want! This goes for everyone.

by ZenWolf187 February 9, 2009

39πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


crackpot theory

a statement or idea (not necessarily presented by a crackhead) that is extremely extensive in nature and ridiculous in realilty.
often preceeded by: "i believe", or "don't you think", or "whould it be a good idea to...."
(often presented under the influence of drugs)

person1: the free masons rule the world
person2: thats a crackpot theory if i ever hurd one before

by dawordspecialist June 25, 2007

56πŸ‘ 6πŸ‘Ž


Quantum Theory

The Quantum mechanics is a fundamental theory in physics that provides a description of the physical properties of nature at the scale of atoms and subatomic particles. It is the foundation of all quantum physics including quantum chemistry, quantum field theory, quantum technology, and quantum information science. It is provides accurate descriptions for many previously unexplained phenomena, such as black-body radiation and the stability of the orbitals of electrons in atoms. It has also given insight into the workings of many different biological systems, including smell receptors and protein structures. This is the hardest part of physics since you are able to create many advanced, high tech things.

β€œDid you know the quantum theory is-β€œ-Max Planck
β€œShut up and stop being a nerd”-Niels Bohr

by SasorSauce December 16, 2022

19πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž