Random
Source Code
Random
A nice guy is the no-in between guy. He is either bald or so exceptionally hairy that he creates shade like a willow tree. He may be shaped like Baby Hughey or thinner than a crack whore (although he will neither use crack or be a whore since he's a nice guy.) In fact they are often virgins (naturally or born again) and volunteer time and funds to drug rehabiliation and other noteworthy programs. The nice guy may have impaired vision and wear thick glasses that create the highly undesirable affects of a funhouse mirror.Other nice guys may have excellent vision in their eyes that bulge, wander or cry frequently. The NICE GUY makes an excellent friend as he picks up tabs, earns trust, runs errands, rarely complains, watches chick flicks, rubs your feet, accepts collect calls, posts bail, and holds a steady job. He is however, unworthy of being kissed or touched in a romantic way - because you can treat the Nice guy anyway you wish and he will accept you with open arms. There is no need to praise, or show positive emotion or affection toward the nice guy... he's loyal as a pooch.
Nice Guy: "We've been friends for a long time now - and I feel really close to you..."
Woman: (immediately interrupts to break his heart) "You're a NICE GUY... but I don't want to ruin our friendship"
49👍 140👎
A man who is overly nice. Typical behavior of a nice lady includes escorting you to your doorstep, Pulling out chairs and apologizing excessively when it is not necessary.
Person 1: I'll have a red bull and vodka, please.
Lady: Oh, I'm sorry but I'm not the bartender...but I'll go ahead and make you that drink anyway.
Person 1: Thanks! You're a nice lady.
4👍 7👎
The feeling someone gets right before their drunk, and before their baked
That party we went to last night was pretty bad all i could get was nicely toasted
4👍 6👎
A girl who will grasp a man's penis and inserts it in her vagina during sex rather than have the man perform the act of penetration
Moon, "I went out with this chic, Julie last night"
Joe, "was she a nice girl?"
Moon, "What do you mean?"
Joe, "Did she put it in for ya?"
Moon, laughing...... "Hell yeah.... She's a nice girl."
50👍 147👎
Nice guys are covert bastards who are just waiting for opportunities to destroy women. Their feigned niceness is just that - feigned. This does not apply to homosexual nice guys who are, in reality, nice. The source of this discrepancy is not known.
For women, nice guys are best handled by using what little they have to offer, and then having nothing more to do with them. Their wisdom, principles and sober thinking are valuable at certain times, and their feigned niceness makes them easy to talk to. However, women are advised not to offer anything more than friendship to them.
Apart from these aspects, nice guys offer precious little to society. In fact, they are causing the deterioration of Western society with their faggy books, computers and telescopes. Haha, telescopes. They possess inferior genes in comparison to Real Men (TM). Nice guys are inherently unable to provide a woman with a good hard fucking, because just look at them. They're too nice.
Things nice guys may (or may not) say:
1. Haha, just LOOK at that skinny guy. HEY, WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? YOU WANT YOUR ASS KICKED?!
2. Get me another beer, love.
3. Girl, Imma treat you so right, you know ah alwez doo. Jyea.
4. Show us your tits! Ack-hurhurhurhur.
5. Is that your car? Ack-hurhurhurhur.
90👍 279👎
saying a women has nice boobs, because boots sounds like "boobs"
GUY: Hey nice boots
girl: uh thanks
guy: she's got no idea
26👍 71👎