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The meaning of the phrase 'Christmas came early' is rather straight forward — that is to depict when something good happens to you unexpectedly, and it feels like Santa brought you an early present.
- she found her cat! Christmas is early this year!
When someone else's New Years Resolution unfortunately involves you.
Mary: "Jim wants to meet up with me. His You Years Resolution is get in touch with all of his old friends."
Linda: "When was the last time you called him?"
Mary: "Like 6 years! And there is a reason for that!"
Jane: "Kathy took me to the gym today."
Joe: "To the gym? You've never been to the gym!
Jane: "I know. Her You Years Resolution is to lose 25 pounds so she bought us both gym memberships. I hate the gym!"
Hell.
liberal arts student: Hey want to go to the club tonight ? I don't have any homework or tests this year.
Engineering student: Nope cant in 1st year Engineering!*hangs himself with a rope made of many homework assignments and practice tests*
What you wear as a granny after preschool glasses
You used to wear preschool glasses but now you wear year 6 glasses
Cookies baked by the neighbour who secretly fancied you. He/she brings them round at the start of January in the hope of instigating some neighbourly lovin’
Neighbour - “Hi, I’ve bought you some New Years Cookies round”
Richard - “What the fuck? Thanks. Wanna fuck?”
Neighbour - “I knew these New Years Cookies would do the trick!”
Every year in high school, the time when everything in school and life gets so overwhelming that you break down and cry.
"Four tests tomorrow and I have work 'till 12 tonight; I'm having my annual mid-year crisis"
"I'll get the tissues."
The act of taking the most vial and disgusting hooker, getting twenty dudes to cum in her, shake a champagne bottle and letting it off in her vagina without cleaning it, then you proceed to drink the champagne from her.
Okay, we're all set! I got the champagne, now who wants a Creamy New Years?