Probably the coolest guy on the face of the planet, bar none!
Whoa, "Honey Closet is rad, dude"
A parent that vaccinates their children or child in secret out of fear of being mocked and shamed by anti-vaxxers.
Did you hear about old Lou Silinavich, I heard he was a closet vaxxer and his kids are actually vaccinated. We shouldn’t let little Bobby Joe & Sue Ellen play with his kids any longer.
A fat person who claims they have medical problems preventing them from being a normal weight when they really just stuff their face.
Barbara has always been very overweight and she always claimed she was on a strict health-food diet plan, but one night I saw her at a buffet with a plate overflowing with hotdogs, sandwiches, fries, chocolate cake, and the list goes on. She's a closet hog.
Someone with the compulsive need to tug-it in the closet. Maybe due to a tramatic event of being walked in upon while giving his reliable pair the 1-2 polish and shine, (he wears sandals). There’s no shame, just more mess and not as much wiggle room as your traditional shower has to offer.
“I myself, am a closet tugger, the doors provide a nice secure barrier from the outside world during me time, and my girlfriends fuzzy scarves drape just low enough to tickle the tip.
“Dave is such a closet tugger! Look, he’s wearing crocs!”
The act of being kinky only when no one else is around.
Jessica Alba was a Closet-Kink because she kept her handcuffs in a lockbox under her bed.
Someone who is a definitely hiding their "interests" but they kinda belong there.
"Dude that man right there is so closeted" "but he's like kinda supposed to be, like a closeted shirt?"
Someone who outwardly pretends to be a Chad and a Alpha male hating on women's rights and those that respect wamen. Normally below 5'6, extremely hairy and have names that rhyme with Pevin.
Wow that Kevin guy is a real closet Beta Male. What a cuck.