You need your shit milked.

You need a sort of stress reliever. In this case, a handjob 'offer'.

provocateur: You're having a bad time with work. You need your shit milked.

Recipient: Eeeaaaah! He's touching me!

need a biscuit

when a ridiculously twiggy person (usually female) walks by and has noassatall. (see noassatall).

ex.: "Damn, that girl need a biscuit!"

He needs it

A stock phrase used in fighting game communities with the intent of making fun of players who main characters with overpowered attributes while insisting that they need said attributes to avoid being bottom-tier.

Smash Bros Spectator 1: So, let me get this straight... Dr. Mario was destroying King K. Rool for the entire last stock... and then K. Rool just mashes Down-Smash in a panic and kills at 50% while he's at 183%?

Spectator 2: I know, right? Trust me bro, he needs it. Definitely.

one day I poked my brother in the eye with an apple pencil. she cried and cried. it was pretty warm so I didnt need a blanket on the hot day of winter

Confliction. Also, you’re not automatically funny by putting this into Urban Dictionary

Guy1: one day I poked my brother in the eye with an apple pencil. she cried and cried. it was pretty warm so I didnt need a blanket on the hot day of winter
Guy2: You’re an idiot.

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Much needed

A made up adjective white women use on Facebook to emphasize the perceived importance of an activity they are posting about, usually involving a vacation or spending time with family or friends. Meant to convey how busy the woman’s life is (hence why this activity was “much needed”), as well as how much the people tagged in the post mean to her/how it makes her look that these people are voluntarily included in her busy life. Every sentence in a “much needed” post ends in an exclamation point.

A much needed family movie night! The perfect way to end our first week back at work after our much needed 2-week trip to Cabo! Hope Ashley and Josh can join us next month on our much needed winery weekend! It can’t come soon enough!

You need to calm down

Said when someone is over reacting to the smallest things especially on the internet.

Also a reference to the song "You need to calm down" by Taylor Swift.

🌈 🦄 🪩 ✨

Person 1:*Over reacting*
Person 2:"You need to calm down, you're being too loud."
Person 3:"And im just like oh-oh,oh-oh,oh-oh,oh-oh,oh-oh."

fam i need to cut

when you are somewhere and you have to leave quickly.

fam i need to cut before my mum gets home.