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a secret sexual act be-known only to the descendants of the French fur trappers who first settled in Canada. It involves a copious amount of males and the rack of a moose, maple syrup, and a silver bowl which has since been modified into the Stanley Cup. Although the action itself is classified those who accomplish the act are free to no longer live in Canada.
A lollipop is to the Wonka Factory as 2 girls 1 cup is to Canada's History.
Wow no more cancer, aids, war, healthcare costs, and Fox News. Really? I wonder who performed Canada's History to make that possible.
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A sexual act that involves a can of shaving cream, Wayne Gretzky autographed hockey stick, Best of Bryan "Too Cool for an I" Adam's Cassette tape and magic.
This act can only be performed on a female. She must be laying in spread eagle like a maple leaf while her partner rams the Wayne Gretzky hockey stick in her anal cavity while the can of shaving cream in inserted into her vagina with the nozzle sticking outward. While the hockey sticking is thrusting back and forth the shaving is to be spayed up in the air to simulate snow. The Bryan Adam's Cassette tape is to be played in the background.
Hey honey, Wayne Gretzky's hockey stick is still up my ass after we went over Canada's History last night.
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When you're going down on your girlfriend while simultaneously eating poutine.
My girlfriend was mad cause I gave her some Canada's History last night; she spent most of the night washing cheese curds out of her beaver.
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Girl's Gone Wild late-night advertisements, with bears, instead of girls. This is Steven Colbert's favorite/worst fantasy.
Also a strain of herpes.
Goddamn, Canada's History is rife with bear fucking and herpes.
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A sex act so depraved that Stephen Colbert could not describe it on air in his Feb 4, 2010 episode. His only hints were that the act involved moose antlers, a jar of maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup.
The act itself consists of three parts, and therefore requires three people: the first person must don the antlers, and ram into the other two as much as possible, while blind-folded, thus exhibiting the mating behavior of the Canadian moose. The second person is the one in possession of the Stanley Cup, and must apply the syrup to it, so as to lubricate it for the final act. Finally, the third person is either entered through the vagina or the anus with the Stanley Cup.
Man, that was one rough night last night. My friends and I tried to recreate Canada's History. I was on the receiving end of the Stanley Cup... I'm still sore...
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When you shove a Canadian Goose up your ass and use your free healthcare to repair your damaged anus.
"I just got back from the doctor's office, one more Canada's History and I'll be shitting feathers for the rest of my life."
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An incredibly long, drawn-out sexual act involving a man, a woman, their daughter and son, Grandma (it helps if she's from Quebec), the family collie, moose antlers, maple syrup and a piece of hockey equipment from a former Shawinigan Junior-B player named Red Stanley (aka "Stanley's Cup", sometimes misinterpreted as the trophy from a professional hockey league).
While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
"Last night's performance of Canada's History was so intense that Grandma's glass-eye wouldn't come back out."
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