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The international time to have sex is 7:40
If the time hits 7:40, its the international time to have sex
95👍 20👎
The mysterious inborn quantum-like power baby dykes have to project sexuality instantaneously over any distance.
Baby dyke sex rays can be transmitted in person, over the telephone, via text message, via email, regular post, or even - some would argue - thought itself. The transmission of the sex rays may be intentional or accidental on the part of the baby dyke.
Upon striking most any more mature / experienced lesbian, the sex rays have the effect of an profoundly potent aphrodesiac, and can also foster feelings of protectiveness, friendship, and love.
It should be noted that while some very few lesbians are almost completely immune, most are not, and will usually succumb to the sex rays eventually whether they want to or not.
Dyke 1: I'm going out with Jessica later.
Dyke 2: Dude... She's like 19!!
Dyke 1: I know... I know... She got me with the baby dyke sex rays!
72👍 14👎
You have you'r lover sit on the bed and pull on her nipple and look deep into her vagina and ask "Oh magic conch shell may i insert my penis into her vagina", and if it respond's with "yes" then you may but if it respond's with "No" then get the will forever remain a virgin.
Oh Magic Conch (Sex Position) could i eat this super delicous ass ?
"yes"
"OH BOY!".
15👍 2👎
Sun Sex and Suspicious Parents, often abbreviated as SS&P is a british reality series following groups of 18-20years old on their first girls/lads holiday in Greece or Spain. The teens think they are away from their parents but their parents are following and watching them throughout their holiday, revealing themselves on the last day.
The show is not staged though on the second and even more on the third series all the participants were suspecting what it was about.
How can all the parents on Sun Sex and Suspicious Parents end up saying how proud they are of their kids?
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Me: "I want to have hot steamy gay sex"
My Mother: "Oh dear lord help me pray the gay away" *slaps*
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When two people fart during sex, preferably loud and a long, wet fart.
Jimmbo: Yo, how was she?
Tyrone: Good, we did doodoo fart nigga sex.
Jimmbo: Really?
Tyrone: Yeah, we doodoo fart nigga sex'd.
52👍 7👎
When you use your thumb to make your partner orgasm and then use said thumb to plug a mortal wound in a major artery.
"How has it been with the wife, Scott?"
"Not good Brandon, she's been mad at me since I used the Kentucky Plug."
The Kentucky Plug (sex position)
19👍 2👎