Random
Source Code
Random
your woman stands over your chest in a thong and drops a split load on it.
Texas log splitter is shitting through a thong
55👍 21👎
stealing nicknames on an IRC server, which confuses bots that keep stats.
*** suzumebachi is now known as h0rn3t
*** garian is now known as suzumebachi
*** suzumebachi is now known as garian
<littlechavez> D:
<littlechavez> stop ucoking teh logs!
13👍 3👎
Having anal sex with a chick who has a thick beard.
Last night, Bill picked up that Latvian waitress with the beard and totally Amish log flumed that hairy bitch.
10👍 2👎
An extremely well thought out sex act that requires advance planning. You begin by dropping a medium to large sized deuce in the toilet. Take said deuce out of the toilet, wrap it in saran wrap and put it in the freezer for 6 hours. After the deuce is thoroughly frozen, take it out and give it to your girlfriend. She then takes the deuce and proceeds to masturbate with it. As the deuce thaws, it slowly deteriorates and clogs up her pussy... hence the log jamming action.
Damian1381 convinced his girlfriend to take part in a Louisiana Log Jammer session with him. Three days later, she came down with a yeast infection.
16👍 4👎
Dusting off the log is what its called when you really have to poop, can't make it to a toilet right away, and you fart instead to help relieve the pressure.
During that meeting, I had to crap so bad that the only way I didn't was to keep dusting off the log.
8👍 1👎
When two people line up butt to butt and poop into each other.
The porno was incredibly boring until the German girls started to do the lunar log-jam.
7👍 1👎
Popular with the wives of British service men during the early 40s, the Lambeth log-flume was the method of choice for uplifting downtrodden spirits during the Blitzkriegs of London. Just as it was not uncommon for young ladies to experience their first sexual awakening through the vibrations emitted from V-1 doodlebug blasts, desperately pining housewives would routinely proposition the first man they encountered (often a relative) during a Blitz by tying a yellow ribbon around the base of his cock shaft.
Tying of the yellow ribbon was instantly recognised as an invitation to partake in the Lambeth log-flume. Spurred on by the vibrations of nearby explosions, the housewife would subtly coax the man into first defecating between her breasts, before urinating into her mouth until the overspill flowed out onto the freshly burdened muddy boob gully – the chocolate torpedo thus resembling a log-flume, surrounded by the flowing rapids of golden cock rain. This scene is re-enacted several times, limited only by the quota of rations that was had on the day.
Baza: “Hey Jeza, the other night I’s met this bint over round by the bins at back o’ Iceland, and ya never guess what! She only gone tied a fuckin’ green ribbon round the base ‘o me old chapper! I was right in theres, so anyways I went and took a fuckin’ cheese wedge on her baps, but forgot about the lamb jalfrezi I ‘ad that morning, and sprayed me beige cream ass jam all in ‘er face like a right fuckin’ cunt! The bint ain’t returnin’ me calls now, but she minged anyway so I’s ain’t bovered. Haha da fuckin’ cunt!”
Gerald: “Not to be the pedant, mon cher ami, but the proposition made by your fair lady friend was sadly misinterpreted. Your unfortunate attempt at the classic 40’s past-time activity known commonly as the Lambeth log-flume was in err, since the very calling card, i.e. said green ribbon tied around said base of penis, was not the colour of prize-winning canary plumage, but rather that of a freshly mown lawn of grass. Green was the colour, and thus, the calling card was for the Stockwell Shit-hammer. I trust that you will take my wisdom on bored and learn from your mistake, and I bid thee farewell!”
19👍 6👎