The act of sliding ones asshole up and down somes nose as if it were a credit card.
In the morning my friend woke up and said what smells like poop. we all laughed and said asteroid carpet.
When your in missionary with your girl, and you take out a box of matches and light her pubes on fire. You then have to proceed to put it out with your nut.
Brady Morrison : you wanna do a carpet fire?
Girl: yes i love being caught on fire it’s so hot.
When a woman has a serious, red, itchy rash on her vagina
Her carpet fire burned and itched like crazy.
Toes that are immensely bigger than the average human's fingers and are able to claw their way into your carpet, through your floor, gripping your house foundation, hence the name carpet crunchers.
Extra 1: BE QUIET DON'T YOU HAVE TWO CARPET CRUNCHERS 3000??
Extra 2: HOW BOUT YOU LEAVE THEM ALONE OR THEYRE GONNA BECOME HUMAN CRUNCHERS
The act of having sex with a monkey on the floor (more specifically a carpet) while being high. This is commonly done between a middle aged man and a very young monkey in a form of bestiality. This is referred to a magic carpet because the carpet flies when you are high.
Clax and the monkey names John had aggressive butt sex after passing around a blunt. This ended up occurring on a carpet for comfort, resulting in Aladdin and Abu’s magic carpet.
A team of midgets it red morph suits let you step on them where you go
“HIGHLY recommend this whole ‘Human Red Carpet’ thing. I just feel so superior walking on red carpet wherever I go.”
Two hairy vaginas being rubbed against eachother in the action of scissoring that often occurs during lesbian sex
"Hey do you wanna hang later and perform the sexual act of a carpet cumsplash?"
"Hell yeah im ready to give you a nice hard carpet burn 😩"