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Comfort Waves are emitted by men while they are doing something they enjoy, especially around the house, or are generally comfortable. If you're enjoying the lazy Saturday afternoon, you're emitting Comfort Waves. Browsing the internet for no good reason? Yes, you're emitting Comfort Waves!
Only mothers, wives, and girlfriends perceive Comfort Waves. These waves are very annoying to women; they sound like a high-pitched buzzing. Wives will try anything to get these Comfort Waves to stop! Common tactics include: honey-do lists, dinner with the in-laws, window shopping, "just talking".
Womens' ability to perceive comfort waves is diminished if they've recently consumed: wine, chocolate, cake, ice cream.
A proper man-cave blocks Comfort Waves.
Jim: Last Sunday I was watching the Big Game, and as soon as I opened my beer, my wife comes up with this long list of things to do!
John: Gotta watch out for those Comfort Waves!
An anal wave is a fart. Passing gas.
Oh! I ate a big plate of beans. I feel an anal wave coming on.
When a person might be waving at either you or a person behind you. There is no way to know unless you turn around to check.
"Bro, I was stuck in a Schrodinger's Wave yesterday!"
"How so?"
"I saw this lady waving in my direction and I wasn't sure if she was referring to me or someone else. Turns out she was waving to someone behind me after I checked."
"Damn, that's rough bro. Must've felt awkward afterwards."
Quickly moving a flame under a just rolled blunt to dry it out.
"Wave that blunt before you spark it"
when someone yells "WAVE!" and everybody stands up and raises their arms like a wave.
Person 1: Wave!!
Crowd: (waves arms as a wave)
Something you don't do when you don't want to deal with somebody.
When you don't want to deal with somebody, don't wave at them, don't make a peace sign with your fingers at them. Quit being a fuckin moron and fucking with their life and their neighborhood.
First the media said a second wave was coming in the fall. Then they said the United States had already begun a third wave. At some point, they just start saying another wave. They must think it's hilarious.
If it's still the second wave, the third wave hasn't begun yet. Some people do pay attention.