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The desperate half-mile sprint a man makes to a local convenience store when he desperately wants sex, has a partner, but isn't willing to risk spawning a crotch goblin. Upon arriving back with condoms, the Condom Mile is complete
Sarah: "Y'know, I was really disappointed I couldn't sleep with Richie at that party last night..."
Jessica: "You should've just had him make the Condom Mile."
Where a man looses his erection during intercourse and blames it on the condom.
Man, I couldn't stay hard for that pig last night. After loosing my wood, I told her I had condomitis, hoping she'd do me bareback or oral but she didn't. It was probably the alcohol more than the condom.
An African condom is an Egyptian foreskin.
When procuring an African condom, one must meet with an Egyptian, who makes all genders try his foreskin for free. This repulsive act is only followed by the Egyptian taxi driver holding their belongings for ransom.
is what happens when you have a bunch of shitty friends who wrap contraceptives around your feet as you are blackout drunk. Caution- may cut off blood circulation in the foot area.
“K got shitfaced last night, and everyone gave him condom foot.”
When a man penetrates a woman while being penetrated anally by a man.
I totally used Tom as a meat Condom to fuck Katie the other day. It was so bro hot.
When a male covers his genitalia in cocaine, then engages in intercourse with a female.
Dude Carlos totally gave Katarina a columbian condom, she was messed up, but she was feeling great!
Knitted Condom is a term to describe how useless a person is as it mirrors how useful a legitimate knitted condom is
He’s as useful as a knitted condom