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Closeted Erectosexual

When you get a massive amount of dog mud on your frontal and eternal.

Sam: Darnley get off of me you’re covered in dog mud!
Jackson: Darnley is honestly such a closeted erectosexual.

by Poopassjackson June 28, 2018


Closet Band

A musical artist or band that a person only listens to in the closet just to avoid the ridicule & laughter from the other 99% of people in the world who hate their music or image.

"Cornelius pretends to like Nine Inch Nails because he wants to mingle with my friends, but Peyton Parrish is his favorite Closet Band. He goes home and flails his arms to his music while dancing to him and everything!"

by ANOTHERDEADROMEO May 29, 2023


slap the closet

When an action is taken with haste or a decision made spontaneously. L

If you slap the closet for Saturday afternoon, I'm sure that'll be fine.

by Kahfeesh September 28, 2017


shrodingers closet

Short hand for explaining your status of being "out" as a member of the LGBTQ+ Community.
When you are out to many people in your personal life but not "officially" out

Person you are out to: I thought you were out? Everyone we know, knows you are 💅

You: I'm out but I'm not, I have a giant pride flag in my dorm room and I'm fine with people assuming and I'm out to most of our (nonhomophobic) friends but if people ask and I don't know where they stand I would actively deny it because of fear of consequences. I call it "shrodingers closet"

Aka:

Iykyk💅

Iydkydk

by Prydab March 24, 2023


Man's not fighting demons, he's fighting closet hangers.

Combines to the common saying of "being in the closet" meaning to be non-publicly queer and fighting demons.

Person 1:"I came out and my friend said: 'We all have those thoughts, we just gotta fight them'"

Person 2:"Man's not fighting demons, he's fighting closet hangers."

by KubaKaktus April 22, 2023


closet chad

A guy who has the perfect genes to be a chad, yet embraces the lifestyle of an otaku. They're the guys that go to con ripped in cosplay, the ones that somehow hold relationships despite playing video games for twelve hours a day, and make you look like a failure at being a failure.

"I thought con was just for neets and degenerates then I saw the guy in the All Might cosplay."
"Nah, he's just a closet chad. I wouldn't regard him as something better."

by karminova April 5, 2018


closet teen

A person - especially male - who is beyond their teen/college years in age yet still has the mindset and interests of a teenager, but who must pass themselves off as a mature, responsible person in order to fit into society.

The reason weed and boobs have the most slang terms for them is because the people who mostly come up with slang terms are teenage boys and closet teens.

by insideout1 June 6, 2012