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a ex-gang member turned vigilante, using unconventional methods to fight crime
Gang member 1: Yo, homie I wonder how Bruce Wayne got all that money. Batman be so tough an' shit.
Gang Member 2: Yo little homie, back in the day dog, back in the day ? Bruce Wayne was a straight up G. Just like us. He made that money selling crack, selling weed an' pimpin'. But then the cops did some Guantanomo shit on his ass an' he became a snitch an' a crime fighter. He reps the blue an' grey cos he still a crip.
Gang Member 1: Thanks dawg for droppin' that knowledge.
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An originally stupid, rubbery and retarded looking comicbook character with floppy ears created by Bob Kane in the 1930's. Luckily the character was rescued and revamped over the years by various comic book artists turning it into one of the coolest heroes of our day. Yet Bob Kane continues to get credit for all of the genius incarnations of this character that have happened ever since. Even though he had absolutely nothing to do with it.
Johnny: Dude! That Batman Begins was a sweet-ass movie!!! Oh, by the way, who the f*ck is Bob Kane??
Timmy: Don't know. But I'm getting tired of seeing his f*cking name on everything related to Batman!
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Batman is a super hero dressed in black spandex, a cape, a mask and a tool belt. He fights crime with his sidekick "Robin." Batman's real identity is that of Bruce Wayne, a millionaire/billionaire (depending upon the decade) who tragically lost his parents in some, presumably, horrible accident. (who really gives a shit about the specifics) In addition, Batman is the only gay superhero, often sodomizing, either forcefully or with consent, his pant-less, much younger "friend and sidekick" Robin. It is rumored also that his butler, Alfred, is involved when "Robin really fucks up on the job" in the "bedroom festivities."
Some of Batman's enemies include the penguin, (Secretly Batman's estranged -- and presumed dead -- father who, before faking his own death by falling into a vat of chemicals, almost certainly molested Bruce as a child) Cat Woman (the woman Bruce almost married before realized he was gay and leaving her at the head of the aisle) and though there are more, the Joker, who in a Bizzare twist is, by some totally inexplicable coincidence, Batman's mother. (also deformed --and with a change of sex -- after falling in a separate vat of chemicals)
Batman/Bruce Wayne's residence is in a giant Mansion in Gotham City (a fictional New York) complete with Bat-Mobile parking, secret underground lair filled with giant glowing screens, flashing lights, and a coffee maker. Additionally there is a BDSM chamber beneath the recreation room.
As in popular cinema:
"-Have you seen the new Batman movie?"
"-No, I heard it was shit."
As in the comic strip:
Robin-
"Gee Batman, whatever are we going to do about The Joker?"
Batman-
"I don't know Robin but at least Gotham is safe one night more."
As in a creepy older man living with a teenage boy
Batman-
"-Oh Robin, why don't you come down stairs to the lair. Alfred and I have a surprise for you."
Robin-
"-Holly rubber fist Batman!!!"
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I am Batman... ooh I mean Filip. Now I have to kill you.
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Is extremely great in bed has a 9 inch penis and will do anything for his friends and get angry easily
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Polish immigrant name for a man's penis. Originates from Polish not knowing the correct word when naming calling or making a request, and using American-inspired TV shows that are imported into their 34 foot diameter satellite dishes.
Anne: You shut your mouth or I will punch you in the batman
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